me about to talk in public: *rehearses what im going to say 50 times in my brain*
me: today how you are

meet-you-in-rehab:

asvprock:

I met my gorgeous girlfriend because of tumblr. FOUND OUT WE LIVE 5MINS FROM EACH OTHER(Next town over) We are both puertorican, almost the same height, our birthdays are 1 day apart, FOUND OUT OUR PARENTS KNEW EACH OTHER 20 YEARS AGO, and they worked together. We clicked so well when we first met! And today is our first month together

HOW DOES THIS EVEN HAPPEN 
I MEAN CONGRATS TO YOU BOTH 
THAT IS EPIC 
BUT 
BUT 
HOW????????????????!


French Friend: well, the total cost of me going to Med school is about 406 a year -
American Friend: THOUSAND?
French Friend: Um, no. 406 Euro. It sounds a little high but it covers the cost of my textbooks, extra classes and most of my housing. How much is it for you?

birdluvr1993:

masculinity is so funny to me bc men deprive themselves of the best things in life in order to achieve it like ….fuzzy socks, fun fruity pink drinks, spa days, lifetime movies,  expressing positive feelings in a healthy way, being a warm genuine person

que-mystery:

arabellesicardi:

"text me when you get home" means "i love you, be safe." 

It really does

forestfairey:

methbusters:

who wants to hire me as their maid i’m not gonna clean im just gonna wear a cute maid outfit dust like 6 things and bend down a lot

Hired

"People think that if you love somebody hard enough then everything is just gonna work out. People are wrong."

friendswithbandefits:

yolucas:

cute story time: my one friend is dating a boy who is blind and they go for walks everyday and as they walk she describes everything to him and he always says that “she makes everything sound so beautiful, except herself, but one day I’m determined to make her describe herself in the same beautiful way she describes the earth” I’m so

OH MY GOD THATS ADORABLE

(Source: fuckmeirwin)